Random Tweets

Random Tweets
[TwitterButtonTop]

I’ve been tweeting a lot lately. Not really sure why, but I have. Some have been during the basketball playoff, some during the Astros and hell tonight as I write this I’m tweeting about the Billboard Music Awards.

Well, with only 280 followers (again, at the time of this writing) I know a lot of you are not seeing them, so screw you, I’m going to post them here in my blog.


Watching The Astros

BarryLaminack
Tonight’s Astros give-away? Ankle braces courtesy of Dr. Scholls. Perfect for Rangers fans that sprained an ankle jumping on the bandwagon.
5/18/12 8:49 PM
BarryLaminack
I like how the bandwagon Rangers fans are up clapping for the Astros. These are the same assholes that wear Texans hats with a Titans jersey
5/19/12 9:02 PM

Watching Basketball

BarryLaminack
Gonna rape the Nuggets? “@President_Trill: Time to activate the Kobesystem on these hoes. #Lakers”
5/6/12 9:05 PM
BarryLaminack
Can we all agree that Jrue is with out a doubt the stupidest spelling of a conventional name in the history of stupidly spelled names?
5/16/12 6:09 PM
BarryLaminack
I wonder if Jrue has turkey & jressing on Thanksgiving. Maybe he gets jrunk and jrools all over the jrapes. I know, I’m just being jramatic.
5/16/12 6:18 PM
BarryLaminack
Hey Andre Miller nice bald spot & Imma let your hair finish fallen out, but Manu Ginobili has the greatest bald spot of all time, ALL TIME!
5/9/12 12:39 AM
BarryLaminack
Craig Sager makes Don Cherry look like Ralph Lauren.
5/6/12 11:20 PM
BarryLaminack
Artest is like an alcoholic dad. Ya never know when he’s going to lose it & start hitting, so you hope he falls asleep before that happens.
5/18/12 11:00 PM

On Magnum Ice Cream

BarryLaminack
Magnum ice cream huh? I’m guessing this won’t be the first time over weight white girls have had a chocolate Magnum in their mouth.
5/20/12 7:43 PM

During the Billboard Music Awards

BarryLaminack
Is it just me or is LMFAO the musical version of Scrape and Punk Ass from TapouT? #fb
5/20/12 7:04 PM
BarryLaminack
Are we sure that’s Bobby’s daughter…and that Whitney didn’t have an affair with Michael Strahan.
5/20/12 9:13 PM

At The Ear, Nose and Throat Doctor

BarryLaminack
Sitting at the ear/nose/throat doctor laughing at the hard of hearing people not hearing their name called.
5/9/12 2:46 PM

Watching Cross Fit

BarryLaminack
One of the cross fit events…who could throw a softball the furthest. Isn’t that some kind of picnic drinking game?
5/12/12 2:18 PM
BarryLaminack
2/3 of this cross fit heat: Ride bike, do the monkey bars. I’ve done this before, but we didn’t call it “crossfit” we called it “field day”
5/12/12 3:00 PM
BarryLaminack
I wonder if they do the Turkey Trot during November #crossfit #hmmmm
5/12/12 3:00 PM
BarryLaminack
At least in the strong man comp. they lift big rocks and pull buses by a rope attached to their testicles.
5/12/12 3:01 PM

On Jon Jones’ DUI

BarryLaminack
At least we won’t be surprised when we see a Bail Bonds sponsor on Jones’ shorts.
5/19/12 1:18 PM
BarryLaminack
Is that some new kind of fancy Vodka? “@JonnyBones: God is good”
5/19/12 9:48 PM

Random Stuff

BarryLaminack
That moment when you think your wife is reaching over to give you a handy, but in fact she’s looking for the remote.
5/7/12 12:15 AM
BarryLaminack
Barry’s Fat Tip of the Day: If you’re fat, don’t hang out with fit people, hang out with fatter-than-you people. Does wonders for the ego.
5/9/12 12:41 PM
BarryLaminack
Just realized I’m so fat that it looks like I have stuff in my pockets, but I don’t.
5/9/12 3:28 PM
BarryLaminack
Sounds like my first time having sex. “@johnwessling: @LanceZierlein @migm_ Expensive, disappointing, uncomfortable. ”
5/12/12 3:03 PM
BarryLaminack
U R now the Mayor of Clogged ArteryVille “@airelav2 Just got the “Pizzaiolo” badge on 4square. I’ve checked in @ 10 different pizza joints!”
5/18/12 9:15 PM
BarryLaminack
Well no wonder the food pyramid is shaped like a slice of pizza “@airelav2 didn’t U learn in school that pizza represents all 4 food groups”
5/18/12 9:26 PM
BarryLaminack
Yeah, ‘cuz single women with more cats than active sex partners are a thrill a minute. “@CajunQueen44: Married couples are boring.”
5/20/12 12:04 AM
BarryLaminack
Like a hamburger…or some ribs. “@TyMo214: If you abuse animals you should be set on fire.”
5/20/12 12:14 AM

[note color="#ffffd6"] Click Here to read more funny Tweets.[/note]

[TwitterButtonBottom]

1 Comment

  1. Andy 2 years ago

    So here is where it all began. Ha ha. the funny tweets. Thanks Barry you made me laugh.

Leave a Reply