Barry Is Funny
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It’s week number 4 of “Random Wweets”. I’m glad you guys and gals out there are enjoying them. Please, please, please, share the page with anyone you think might need a smile.
Also, I always enjoy and appreciate any time you guys leave me comments, so feel free to do so.
Don’t forget to follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/barrylaminack (or @BarryLaminack) – what I post here is only a small portion of what I tweet during the week. I also love to chat with folks and have some fun, so hit me up!
Some Advice
| BarryLaminack Ladies if you’re gonna post pictures of you laying out on the beach on Facebook, at least get a pedi so it doesn’t look like you’ve been kicking pineapples all day. 6/5/12 2:48 PM |
| BarryLaminack Married Man Tip #78: when your wife shows you her new panties she just bought, don’t reply ” God damn those are huge!”. Trust me on this one. 6/6/12 11:42 PM |
| BarryLaminack Support the USA, only buy American hookers. 6/8/12 1:45 PM |
The Gym
| BarryLaminack I just left the gym 6/9/12 12:53 PM |
| BarryLaminack Sorry that last tweet was a typo, I meant to say I just left my dignity at the gym. 6/9/12 12:54 PM |
| BarryLaminack Good news folks, I called the gym and they have my pride at the lost and found. No word on my dignity or manhood yet. 6/9/12 12:58 PM |
My Weekly Fat Joke(s)
| BarryLaminack I’m so fat now my bed has a a huge dent in it…and I sleep on the floor. 6/7/12 11:22 PM |
| BarryLaminack Following her, hoping she leads me to the good snacks: http://instagr.am/p/LgeE4-lGuu/ 6/7/12 10:42 PM |
| BarryLaminack Put em in ur sock, Fonzie. “@TyMo214: @BarryLaminack what if I’m going to a sock hop with Rizzo and I need a place to put my smokes?” 6/7/12 10:44 PM |
| BarryLaminack Stay gold, not rolled. “@TyMo214: @BarryLaminack that’s crazy talk. What will Pony Boy and Soda Pop say if they see me do that?” 6/7/12 10:47 PM |
| BarryLaminack It was electrifying…so you better shape up. “@TyMo214: @BarryLaminack that last tweet made my chills multiply, and me lose control” 6/7/12 10:50 PM |
In Reply To…
| BarryLaminack For $350 an hour I can! “@atxhobogrl: @producermike975 Cant beat an indian headdress & bananas” 6/4/12 2:59 PM |
| BarryLaminack must…not…make…penis…joke. “@jusmaryT: What ever i got my hands on today went straight in my mouth, couldn’t help myself” 6/5/12 6:44 AM |
| BarryLaminack Probably a steak…and excuses. “@mitchnortonbjj: “Tears will get you sympathy, sweat will get you results.”…what are you gonna make today?” 6/6/12 8:18 AM |
| BarryLaminack I hope you don’t plan on eating before the show “@Oscar__Keith: Awesome! I just won 2 free tix to go see your mom naked!” 6/6/12 3:01 PM |
| BarryLaminack Just poop yourself. Works for me. “@JennyX3Soto: I need to invent a creeper repellant© idk why but they follow me #randomthought” 6/6/12 11:34 PM |
| BarryLaminack So “God’s love” is my morning pee wood? Interesting. “@4LuvofMe: Love woke you up this morning! God’s love!” 6/7/12 8:55 AM |
| BarryLaminack Except getting rid of the herpes.”@MigM_: Anything is possible.” 6/7/12 9:34 PM |
| BarryLaminack Fucking women drivers…”@RT_America: Chicago cops Taser 8-month pregnant woman for parking violation http://t.co/0TtWW2Lz” 6/7/12 11:06 PM |
I Don’t Like Stephen A Smith
| BarryLaminack Dear Lord, if you need to do a test run with Jesus before the real return, can you practice with Steven A. Smith? 6/6/12 8:47 AM |
| BarryLaminack Relax folks, I don’t really wish Steven A. Smith would die,I just wish his career would. 6/6/12 8:53 AM |
| BarryLaminack Stephen A Smith and Skip Bayless should punch each other to death. They are beyond terrible. 6/7/12 10:09 PM |
Sports
| BarryLaminack June 9th. Manny Pacquiao vs Timothy Bradley are going to be boxing on Pay Per Vie…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz 6/6/12 7:22 AM |
| BarryLaminack Remember when tennis was fun to watch. Yeah, me either. 6/8/12 10:29 AM |
D-Day Anniversary
| BarryLaminack Dear France, You mealy-mouthed, whiney, ungrateful, uppity, stinky, faggot ass surrendering pussies are welcome. Signed, America. 6/6/12 1:03 PM |
| BarryLaminack Today is the anniversary of D-Day and @Google uses the doodle to celebrate the 79th anniv. of the drive in movie theater. Fuck you Google. 6/6/12 12:58 PM |
Buying Wine
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Remember When…
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Click Here to read more funny Tweets.
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One Response to Random Tweets Part 4
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Ok, yeah, I like da tweets. No 4 now, I am gonna keep going back all the way to No 1.